1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:02,419 Now I'm gonna have you step on the scale. 2 00:00:30,447 --> 00:00:33,450 Mm, no, no. Just... Wait, wait, wait. 3 00:00:50,508 --> 00:00:51,843 Hmm. 4 00:01:00,894 --> 00:01:03,313 Okay, great. 5 00:01:03,355 --> 00:01:05,440 Nora here is just gonna take some blood, 6 00:01:05,522 --> 00:01:07,859 and then you'll be all set. 7 00:01:07,901 --> 00:01:09,319 You have to do a blood panel? 8 00:01:09,361 --> 00:01:11,029 Uh, it's standard for all physicals. 9 00:01:11,112 --> 00:01:14,449 Well, next time do it before you weigh me. 10 00:01:14,532 --> 00:01:16,658 I am gonna refer you to an audiologist 11 00:01:16,701 --> 00:01:18,703 because I think you may have slight presbycusis, 12 00:01:18,787 --> 00:01:21,623 but it's normal to have some hearing loss at your age. 13 00:01:21,706 --> 00:01:23,708 I'll have you know I have excellent hearing. 14 00:01:23,750 --> 00:01:26,878 I overheard your nurse in the waiting room violating HIPAA. 15 00:01:26,920 --> 00:01:28,672 Okay. 16 00:01:28,713 --> 00:01:30,507 And I'm gonna recommend you get the pneumonia vaccine 17 00:01:30,548 --> 00:01:32,092 since you're over 65. 18 00:01:32,175 --> 00:01:35,261 Well, it's your word against mine. 19 00:01:35,345 --> 00:01:37,597 Have a nice afternoon. 20 00:01:37,681 --> 00:01:39,223 Yeah, tough room. 21 00:01:39,265 --> 00:01:41,267 - What's that? - Nothing. 22 00:01:41,351 --> 00:01:42,727 Okay. 23 00:01:43,978 --> 00:01:46,481 Now who's hard of hearing? 24 00:01:51,277 --> 00:01:53,029 Ladies, are you just sick to death 25 00:01:53,071 --> 00:01:54,698 of your microwave being so ugly? 26 00:01:54,739 --> 00:01:57,741 Well, we found Betty here, who has cracked the code. 27 00:01:57,783 --> 00:02:00,203 The House of Vance microwave skin collection 28 00:02:00,245 --> 00:02:02,872 now lets you use your microwave to express yourself. 29 00:02:02,914 --> 00:02:04,666 Finally! 30 00:02:04,749 --> 00:02:06,501 No longer do you have to look at an ugly metal box. 31 00:02:06,584 --> 00:02:09,586 For instance, this one has a gorgeous sunset view 32 00:02:09,628 --> 00:02:11,381 - of the Ponte Vecchio. - Oh. 33 00:02:11,423 --> 00:02:14,551 A-and don't forget these little pockets on the side. 34 00:02:14,592 --> 00:02:16,553 Oh, that's right, they have pockets. 35 00:02:16,594 --> 00:02:18,763 That's how you know it's a boy. 36 00:02:18,805 --> 00:02:21,099 And what couldn't you put in there? 37 00:02:21,182 --> 00:02:23,560 Anything larger than 4 by 2. 38 00:02:23,601 --> 00:02:25,270 Uh... 39 00:02:25,311 --> 00:02:27,355 Uh, Betty, I just think you're a genius. 40 00:02:27,439 --> 00:02:28,773 How did you come up with this idea? 41 00:02:28,815 --> 00:02:31,067 Oh, well, I-I used to be married, 42 00:02:31,109 --> 00:02:33,361 and I always wanted to go to Paris... 43 00:02:33,445 --> 00:02:34,904 - Mr. Vaughn. - Roy. 44 00:02:34,988 --> 00:02:36,239 - Hey. - What are you doing down here? 45 00:02:36,281 --> 00:02:37,615 Well, I came to see you. 46 00:02:37,656 --> 00:02:39,659 House of Vance sales are fantastic. 47 00:02:39,743 --> 00:02:41,745 - Congratulations. - We're very happy about it. 48 00:02:41,786 --> 00:02:44,873 With these numbers, I might have to poach you from Deborah. 49 00:02:44,956 --> 00:02:46,541 You know she owns a gun, Roy. 50 00:02:46,544 --> 00:02:48,171 She'd kneecap me in a second. 51 00:02:48,213 --> 00:02:50,382 Oh, please, she would go straight for the groin. 52 00:02:50,465 --> 00:02:52,842 Still, think about it. 53 00:02:54,344 --> 00:02:55,845 I will. 54 00:02:55,886 --> 00:02:57,639 Next up, we're gonna change the way you store 55 00:02:57,681 --> 00:02:59,266 your salad dressing forever. 56 00:02:59,349 --> 00:03:01,017 Yes! 57 00:03:01,059 --> 00:03:02,602 Have we heard back from that doctor? 58 00:03:02,686 --> 00:03:04,312 Oh, I think he'll just send the results 59 00:03:04,396 --> 00:03:06,523 - directly to the network. - Well, I don't trust him. 60 00:03:06,564 --> 00:03:08,275 I don't know why I couldn't have seen my own doctor. 61 00:03:08,358 --> 00:03:10,277 - He's a pushover. - Huh. Okay. 62 00:03:10,360 --> 00:03:12,112 Well, you know, this is good. 63 00:03:12,195 --> 00:03:13,697 The fact that they had you do an insurance physical 64 00:03:13,738 --> 00:03:15,240 means they're serious about you. 65 00:03:15,282 --> 00:03:16,741 Apparently it's down to you, Jack Danby, 66 00:03:16,783 --> 00:03:18,076 and some guy who won the X Games? 67 00:03:18,118 --> 00:03:20,036 I doubt he's funny. 68 00:03:20,078 --> 00:03:21,913 Well, they better have made those guys take physicals, too, 69 00:03:21,997 --> 00:03:23,748 or we're gonna have a big lawsuit on our hands. 70 00:03:23,790 --> 00:03:25,542 Yeah, you know what? I'm gonna go ahead and say 71 00:03:25,583 --> 00:03:27,252 I think it's wise to not sue the network 72 00:03:27,335 --> 00:03:29,087 you're hoping will hire you. 73 00:03:29,170 --> 00:03:31,089 - Fine. - Look, this is all good. 74 00:03:31,131 --> 00:03:32,841 And you emceeing the charity event for the affiliates 75 00:03:32,924 --> 00:03:34,301 is a genius way to curry favor. 76 00:03:34,384 --> 00:03:35,927 - Just focus on that. - Yeah. 77 00:03:35,969 --> 00:03:37,929 No, you're right. No, I have to kill there. 78 00:03:37,971 --> 00:03:40,223 I have some time now, so Ava and I are gonna work on it. 79 00:03:40,265 --> 00:03:42,350 Ava and Deborah, my two gorgeous girls. 80 00:03:42,434 --> 00:03:44,019 I think it's okay to say that, right? 81 00:03:44,102 --> 00:03:45,770 Goodbye, Jimmy. 82 00:03:45,812 --> 00:03:47,397 Y-you're hanging up because you have to go, right? 83 00:03:47,439 --> 00:03:48,940 Not because I said the "gorgeous girls" thing? 84 00:03:49,023 --> 00:03:51,568 Hello? Deborah? 85 00:03:51,610 --> 00:03:55,280 Fine. Everything's good. 86 00:03:55,322 --> 00:03:59,451 Okay, what do 50-year-old men who own TV stations 87 00:03:59,492 --> 00:04:01,745 who you need to charm so that they'll give you 88 00:04:01,786 --> 00:04:04,598 a late-night TV show find funny? 89 00:04:05,081 --> 00:04:07,375 I don't know. 90 00:04:10,295 --> 00:04:12,130 What the hell are you doing? 91 00:04:14,090 --> 00:04:15,925 This is how I sip now. Don't start. 92 00:04:15,967 --> 00:04:17,636 I don't like it, but, you know, 93 00:04:17,718 --> 00:04:20,055 I found out I've been doing it wrong all these years. 94 00:04:20,138 --> 00:04:22,641 The traditional pedestrian sip causes lip lines. 95 00:04:22,724 --> 00:04:25,393 - Mm. - Watch. 96 00:04:25,477 --> 00:04:26,811 See? 97 00:04:26,895 --> 00:04:28,313 All that crinkling leads to wrinkling. 98 00:04:28,396 --> 00:04:29,465 Uh-huh. 99 00:04:29,466 --> 00:04:31,433 You got to make your upper lip almost disappear. 100 00:04:31,476 --> 00:04:33,562 That's how you know you're doing it right... look. 101 00:04:36,148 --> 00:04:37,691 Yeah, wrinkles are unattractive. 102 00:04:37,774 --> 00:04:39,318 Definitely keep doing it like that. 103 00:04:39,359 --> 00:04:40,902 I will. 104 00:04:46,533 --> 00:04:48,160 Oh, my God. 105 00:04:50,370 --> 00:04:51,830 What's the matter? 106 00:04:51,914 --> 00:04:53,665 Apparently Ruby packed up all my stuff, 107 00:04:53,707 --> 00:04:55,667 - wants to know where to send it. - Have her throw it away. 108 00:04:55,751 --> 00:04:57,586 My stuff? No. 109 00:04:57,669 --> 00:05:00,130 I just want her to put it in boxes in the garage. 110 00:05:00,172 --> 00:05:02,507 Sending it somewhere seems so final. 111 00:05:02,549 --> 00:05:04,468 Can we get back to writing jokes? 112 00:05:04,509 --> 00:05:06,303 Sorry. 113 00:05:06,345 --> 00:05:08,597 I'll be funny now. 114 00:05:12,184 --> 00:05:14,603 Hey, look, I have writer's block, 115 00:05:14,686 --> 00:05:16,396 you have manic depression. 116 00:05:16,480 --> 00:05:18,357 How about we, uh, I don't know, take a walk or something? 117 00:05:18,398 --> 00:05:21,360 You know, change of scenery, move our bodies. 118 00:05:21,443 --> 00:05:23,695 Yes. I love that idea. 119 00:05:23,779 --> 00:05:25,697 There are so many amazing trails around here. 120 00:05:25,781 --> 00:05:27,699 Uh, no, I was thinking of more like a walk 121 00:05:27,783 --> 00:05:31,286 - around an outlet mall with a Gucci. - No, please. 122 00:05:31,370 --> 00:05:33,872 We're in the middle of gorgeous Pennsylvania forestry. 123 00:05:33,914 --> 00:05:36,917 It's like "Twilight" out there. Kristen Stewart. 124 00:05:37,000 --> 00:05:40,003 Unless you can't handle a hike. 125 00:05:40,045 --> 00:05:41,630 Let's do it. 126 00:05:41,713 --> 00:05:44,007 Yeah! I get to wear my thick socks. 127 00:05:44,049 --> 00:05:45,467 Yippee. 128 00:05:49,554 --> 00:05:51,223 Okay. 129 00:05:51,265 --> 00:05:54,017 So there's a trail that we could do that's a loop, 130 00:05:54,059 --> 00:05:56,895 but it's saying it's about 90 minutes. 131 00:05:56,979 --> 00:05:59,106 - That's fine. - Okay. 132 00:06:00,732 --> 00:06:02,901 Oh, no, this is a super-casual forest. 133 00:06:02,985 --> 00:06:05,988 - You don't need to wear gloves. - Ha. 134 00:06:06,071 --> 00:06:09,199 They're sun-protection gloves, UPF of 50-plus. 135 00:06:09,241 --> 00:06:10,951 The hands never lie. 136 00:06:11,034 --> 00:06:13,453 Only part of your body you can't help surgically. 137 00:06:13,537 --> 00:06:16,039 There's no such thing as a hand job. 138 00:06:16,081 --> 00:06:18,000 My eighth-grade boyfriend, Brendan Otis, 139 00:06:18,083 --> 00:06:19,710 would beg to differ. 140 00:06:19,751 --> 00:06:21,587 - Ew. - Ugh. 141 00:06:21,670 --> 00:06:24,381 It's too young, in retrospect. 142 00:06:24,423 --> 00:06:26,216 Happened on a trampoline. 143 00:06:26,258 --> 00:06:28,594 - Disgusting. - Okay, stop. 144 00:06:32,263 --> 00:06:35,517 God, I'm already feeling so much better. 145 00:06:35,601 --> 00:06:38,186 After a major life event, it is so healing 146 00:06:38,270 --> 00:06:39,813 to commune with nature, 147 00:06:39,896 --> 00:06:42,524 listen to what the old gal has to say. 148 00:06:42,608 --> 00:06:45,485 Major life even... Oh, you mean that girl? 149 00:06:45,569 --> 00:06:48,655 Yeah. She was my long-term partner. 150 00:06:48,739 --> 00:06:50,364 Long-term partner. 151 00:06:50,449 --> 00:06:52,200 You make it sound like you drove her 152 00:06:52,284 --> 00:06:54,244 to dialysis appointments. 153 00:06:54,286 --> 00:06:57,039 Wait, why do you even want to be in a relationship? 154 00:06:57,080 --> 00:06:59,654 Um, probably 'cause they're the basic building blocks 155 00:06:59,658 --> 00:07:00,751 of human connection. 156 00:07:00,792 --> 00:07:03,295 I'm serious. You're 27 years old. 157 00:07:03,378 --> 00:07:05,255 This is the time to focus on you. 158 00:07:05,297 --> 00:07:08,550 Okay. Sure, but I can do both. 159 00:07:08,634 --> 00:07:10,218 No, when you're in a relationship, 160 00:07:10,302 --> 00:07:12,012 you make decisions for the two of you. 161 00:07:12,095 --> 00:07:14,806 And it's hard enough to make it in this business. 162 00:07:14,848 --> 00:07:17,517 You got to concentrate on what's best for you. 163 00:07:17,601 --> 00:07:19,853 You know, just, you know, buy a vibrator. 164 00:07:19,937 --> 00:07:21,355 Okay. 165 00:07:21,438 --> 00:07:24,316 Hilarious that you think I don't have a vibrator. 166 00:07:24,358 --> 00:07:26,151 Plus, it's not like I just choose 167 00:07:26,234 --> 00:07:27,778 not to want a relationship. 168 00:07:27,819 --> 00:07:29,947 I've always wanted one. 169 00:07:29,988 --> 00:07:34,785 I mean, have you never considered getting remarried? 170 00:07:34,826 --> 00:07:36,495 I had a husband. 171 00:07:36,578 --> 00:07:37,829 And he's in hell. 172 00:07:37,912 --> 00:07:40,707 Yeah, that's why I said remarried. 173 00:07:40,791 --> 00:07:44,795 Seriously, who's, like, your dream man? 174 00:07:44,836 --> 00:07:47,005 Hmm. 175 00:07:47,047 --> 00:07:48,715 The work ethic of John Rockefeller 176 00:07:48,799 --> 00:07:50,676 in the body of James Gandolfini. 177 00:07:50,807 --> 00:07:54,269 Absolutely nuts. 178 00:07:54,311 --> 00:07:56,563 No, I-I'm never gonna get remarried. 179 00:07:56,605 --> 00:07:59,274 I don't want to have to make room in the fridge for tapioca 180 00:07:59,358 --> 00:08:01,693 or whatever the hell old men eat. 181 00:08:01,777 --> 00:08:03,111 Okay. 182 00:08:03,195 --> 00:08:05,614 - Don't you ever get lonely? - No. 183 00:08:07,616 --> 00:08:09,451 Oh. 184 00:08:09,493 --> 00:08:12,621 Maybe sometimes when I open a bottle of Krug. 185 00:08:14,456 --> 00:08:17,167 You know, can't recork champagne. 186 00:08:17,250 --> 00:08:20,295 Hmm. 187 00:08:20,337 --> 00:08:22,255 Oh. Oh. 188 00:08:22,297 --> 00:08:23,924 I got to scan these mushrooms. 189 00:08:23,965 --> 00:08:25,133 What? 190 00:08:25,175 --> 00:08:26,885 You're gonna scan a mushroom? 191 00:08:26,968 --> 00:08:28,637 Yeah. Yeah. 192 00:08:28,720 --> 00:08:31,473 Recently got into foraging... well, the idea of it. 193 00:08:31,515 --> 00:08:33,724 Haven't actually done it yet until now. 194 00:08:33,809 --> 00:08:36,144 Maiden voyage. 195 00:08:36,228 --> 00:08:38,104 It's, uh... oh, inconclusive. 196 00:08:38,146 --> 00:08:40,399 Got to get a better angle. 197 00:08:40,482 --> 00:08:42,651 No. 198 00:08:42,693 --> 00:08:44,444 No. 199 00:08:44,486 --> 00:08:46,154 Were you brought up in a barn? 200 00:08:46,238 --> 00:08:48,156 It's a chanterelle. 201 00:08:48,240 --> 00:08:49,950 Yeah. 202 00:08:49,991 --> 00:08:52,244 Chanterelle. 203 00:08:52,327 --> 00:08:53,620 Awesome. 204 00:09:00,460 --> 00:09:02,004 Oh, sick. 205 00:09:02,045 --> 00:09:04,506 Perfect walking stick. 206 00:09:04,548 --> 00:09:05,757 Oh. 207 00:09:05,841 --> 00:09:08,802 All right, let's see. 208 00:09:08,844 --> 00:09:10,637 So one of the Florida affiliates 209 00:09:10,679 --> 00:09:12,472 is originally from London. 210 00:09:12,514 --> 00:09:15,017 So maybe some London-based humor, though I've never been. 211 00:09:15,058 --> 00:09:17,352 - So I don't know. - Whoa, whoa, whoa. 212 00:09:17,394 --> 00:09:18,854 - You've never been to London? - No. 213 00:09:18,895 --> 00:09:20,397 I've actually never been outside of the country... 214 00:09:20,480 --> 00:09:21,773 well, besides Montreal. 215 00:09:21,857 --> 00:09:23,650 And I was supposed to go to Iceland, 216 00:09:23,692 --> 00:09:26,153 but that didn't end up happening. 217 00:09:26,194 --> 00:09:28,572 But you've been to Paris? 218 00:09:28,655 --> 00:09:32,701 No, again, out of the country would include Paris. 219 00:09:32,784 --> 00:09:35,162 Oh, my God. 220 00:09:35,203 --> 00:09:37,873 You've never had real bread. 221 00:09:37,956 --> 00:09:39,374 I feel like I have. 222 00:09:39,538 --> 00:09:41,748 No, you haven't. 223 00:09:41,790 --> 00:09:44,042 Oh, my God, you have to go to Paris. 224 00:09:44,126 --> 00:09:45,877 And Venice. 225 00:09:45,961 --> 00:09:47,754 You haven't lived till you've seen the canals of Venice. 226 00:09:47,796 --> 00:09:50,298 Saw the Ponte Vecchio on a microwave this morning. 227 00:09:50,382 --> 00:09:52,759 - Sold out. - Whoa. 228 00:09:52,801 --> 00:09:54,302 Hang on, sorry, this can't be right. 229 00:09:54,344 --> 00:09:56,555 Let me just check something. 230 00:09:56,638 --> 00:09:58,265 Um... 231 00:09:58,306 --> 00:10:00,600 I'm a little confused by the trail map. 232 00:10:00,642 --> 00:10:05,355 Are we supposed to go down this ravine and cross the stream? 233 00:10:05,439 --> 00:10:07,065 Maybe we should turn around. 234 00:10:07,149 --> 00:10:09,401 Oh, you mean maybe I should turn around? 235 00:10:09,484 --> 00:10:10,986 No, that is not what I mean. 236 00:10:11,027 --> 00:10:13,780 But, I mean, come on, it's so steep... we can't. 237 00:10:13,822 --> 00:10:16,783 If this is the trail, let's follow it. 238 00:10:16,825 --> 00:10:18,160 All right, at least take the walking stick. 239 00:10:18,201 --> 00:10:20,245 Ah, ah. Come on, let's go. Let's go. 240 00:10:24,374 --> 00:10:27,169 Okay. 241 00:10:27,210 --> 00:10:28,962 - Oh! Ah! - Oh, shit. Fuck. 242 00:10:29,004 --> 00:10:30,380 - Oh, shit. - Ow. 243 00:10:30,464 --> 00:10:32,841 Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. 244 00:10:32,924 --> 00:10:34,509 Are you okay? 245 00:10:34,593 --> 00:10:36,011 Come on. Here, I got you. 246 00:10:36,052 --> 00:10:38,346 Holy shit. 247 00:10:38,388 --> 00:10:40,682 Okay, okay, okay. 248 00:10:40,766 --> 00:10:43,602 - Oh. - Okay, come on. 249 00:10:43,685 --> 00:10:45,437 Okay, let's get you down. 250 00:10:45,520 --> 00:10:46,605 Oh, shit. 251 00:10:46,688 --> 00:10:48,482 Oh, my God, are you okay? 252 00:10:48,523 --> 00:10:50,484 - I'm fine. - I heard a pop. 253 00:10:50,525 --> 00:10:53,278 Yeah, so did I, which means my hearing is just fine. 254 00:10:53,361 --> 00:10:54,863 We should turn around, get you help. 255 00:10:54,905 --> 00:10:56,656 We've been walking for an hour. 256 00:10:56,698 --> 00:10:59,826 If it's a loop, it'll be closer If we just keep going. 257 00:10:59,868 --> 00:11:01,369 I guess. Let me see where we are. 258 00:11:01,411 --> 00:11:03,121 - I got to keep moving. - No. 259 00:11:03,205 --> 00:11:05,248 - Well, take my hand at least. - I don't need your hand! 260 00:11:05,332 --> 00:11:07,250 Oh, fuck! 261 00:11:07,334 --> 00:11:09,252 Oh, shit. 262 00:11:09,336 --> 00:11:11,171 Oh. Oh. 263 00:11:11,213 --> 00:11:13,131 - Careful. God. - Fuck. 264 00:11:13,173 --> 00:11:15,133 Oh, my God. 265 00:11:15,217 --> 00:11:18,428 Okay, what are we gonna do? We should put it in rice. 266 00:11:18,512 --> 00:11:21,014 Rice? Where are we gonna find rice? 267 00:11:21,056 --> 00:11:22,641 How the hell should I know? 268 00:11:22,724 --> 00:11:24,851 You're the one who always has food on her. 269 00:11:24,893 --> 00:11:26,853 Oh, fuck, it's dead. 270 00:11:26,895 --> 00:11:29,856 Okay, give me your phone. I'll pull up the map on yours. 271 00:11:29,940 --> 00:11:32,150 I don't have my phone. 272 00:11:32,234 --> 00:11:34,194 - What? - Where would I have my phone? 273 00:11:34,277 --> 00:11:36,530 - I don't have a purse. - Your pockets. 274 00:11:36,571 --> 00:11:38,224 I don't put anything in my pockets. 275 00:11:38,225 --> 00:11:40,742 - It ruins my lines. - It ruins your lines? 276 00:11:40,784 --> 00:11:42,369 Oh, my God, so we're stranded 277 00:11:42,410 --> 00:11:44,246 in the middle of the woods without phones? 278 00:11:44,329 --> 00:11:46,540 - And whose fault is that? - It was your idea. 279 00:11:46,581 --> 00:11:48,417 Let's get out, move our bodies. 280 00:11:48,500 --> 00:11:51,044 - That's you. - I suggested a mall! 281 00:11:51,086 --> 00:11:53,505 This wouldn't have happened at the King of Prussia. 282 00:11:53,588 --> 00:11:55,924 And if it did, there would've been an Apple store! 283 00:11:55,966 --> 00:11:57,592 Okay! Okay. 284 00:11:57,634 --> 00:11:59,886 Let's just finish and get you to the car. 285 00:11:59,928 --> 00:12:01,430 Come on. 286 00:12:01,471 --> 00:12:03,598 - Ow. - Here, take that. 287 00:12:03,640 --> 00:12:05,892 Okay, come on. 288 00:12:16,903 --> 00:12:18,280 I-I-I-I need a break. 289 00:12:18,321 --> 00:12:21,491 - Okay. Okay. - Well, here. Just... 290 00:12:21,575 --> 00:12:23,452 All right, let's just get you down. 291 00:12:26,413 --> 00:12:27,998 - You good? - I'm good. I'm good. I'm good. 292 00:12:28,081 --> 00:12:29,708 - Okay? - I'm good. I got it. I got it. 293 00:12:29,791 --> 00:12:32,335 Okay. 294 00:12:33,837 --> 00:12:36,631 I think we should make you a splint. 295 00:12:36,673 --> 00:12:38,925 You can't tie a simple double Windsor. 296 00:12:38,967 --> 00:12:41,470 How are you gonna make a splint? 297 00:12:41,553 --> 00:12:44,806 No, but I did go to gymnastics camp. 298 00:12:44,890 --> 00:12:46,725 And I was really bad after I got my period, 299 00:12:46,808 --> 00:12:47,976 so I spent a lot of time 300 00:12:48,018 --> 00:12:49,394 sitting next to the team doctor, 301 00:12:49,478 --> 00:12:51,062 and, yeah, I picked up a couple things. 302 00:12:51,146 --> 00:12:53,440 Maybe I should just let birds peck at my body 303 00:12:53,482 --> 00:12:55,692 until I'm completely gone. 304 00:12:59,029 --> 00:13:01,239 Oh, yeah, this is good. 305 00:13:02,824 --> 00:13:04,493 Ooh. 306 00:13:04,534 --> 00:13:06,328 Okay. 307 00:13:06,411 --> 00:13:08,955 Sorry. 308 00:13:08,997 --> 00:13:10,832 - Ow! - Sorry, sorry. 309 00:13:10,874 --> 00:13:12,667 - Damn it. - Sorry. 310 00:13:12,709 --> 00:13:14,628 Look, I know it hurts right now, but it's gonna be okay. 311 00:13:14,669 --> 00:13:16,671 You know, it's maybe a sprain. 312 00:13:16,713 --> 00:13:18,381 Worst case, you'll have to wear, 313 00:13:18,465 --> 00:13:20,342 - like, a boot or something. - A boot? 314 00:13:20,383 --> 00:13:22,719 Oh, clomp around like I lost a ski... fantastic. 315 00:13:22,803 --> 00:13:25,597 A boot is not that bad. 316 00:13:25,680 --> 00:13:27,307 Yeah, well, me wearing a boot 317 00:13:27,349 --> 00:13:29,059 is different than you wearing a boot. 318 00:13:29,142 --> 00:13:31,144 - 'Cause of paparazzi? - No. 319 00:13:31,186 --> 00:13:33,647 Me wearing a boot, I look old and frail. 320 00:13:33,688 --> 00:13:36,399 Same as wearing a hearing aid or whatever. 321 00:13:36,483 --> 00:13:38,944 I'm not gonna do that. 322 00:13:39,027 --> 00:13:40,987 Well, yeah, but it's okay 323 00:13:41,029 --> 00:13:43,115 if you need those things, though, right? 324 00:13:43,198 --> 00:13:44,950 I mean, it's perfectly natural 325 00:13:45,033 --> 00:13:47,119 for you not to be able to do all the things you used to. 326 00:13:47,202 --> 00:13:49,996 But that's the thing... I still feel like I can do everything. 327 00:13:50,038 --> 00:13:52,874 I don't feel my age. 328 00:13:52,958 --> 00:13:56,878 Then I look in the mirror, and I don't recognize myself. 329 00:13:56,962 --> 00:13:59,047 Well, you do redo your face a lot. 330 00:13:59,089 --> 00:14:02,467 I don't redo, I refresh. 331 00:14:02,551 --> 00:14:04,636 The whole goal is to keep it the same 332 00:14:04,719 --> 00:14:06,471 'cause I feel the same. 333 00:14:06,555 --> 00:14:09,808 I feel like a 30-year-old... 334 00:14:09,891 --> 00:14:12,769 who can't read the menu without a flashlight. 335 00:14:15,856 --> 00:14:17,149 Okay. 336 00:14:17,232 --> 00:14:19,401 You should be good to go. 337 00:14:21,862 --> 00:14:25,740 You're no Ferragamo, but it'll do. 338 00:14:39,129 --> 00:14:40,338 Sorry. 339 00:14:40,422 --> 00:14:42,257 Oh, God. 340 00:14:42,299 --> 00:14:44,676 Okay. All right. 341 00:14:44,760 --> 00:14:46,595 Onward. 342 00:15:01,610 --> 00:15:02,944 - Ow! - Sorry. 343 00:15:03,028 --> 00:15:04,446 Crap. Shit. 344 00:15:04,529 --> 00:15:06,239 You're fine. You're fine. 345 00:15:06,281 --> 00:15:08,408 Are we almost there? 346 00:15:08,450 --> 00:15:11,077 This... this can't be right. 347 00:15:11,119 --> 00:15:12,746 I think it is. 348 00:15:12,788 --> 00:15:15,332 Hang on, let me just... let's just get you stable. 349 00:15:15,415 --> 00:15:17,084 - Let me park you right here. - Ah. 350 00:15:17,125 --> 00:15:18,668 Okay, okay. Are you okay? 351 00:15:18,752 --> 00:15:20,962 - Yeah. - Um... 352 00:15:21,004 --> 00:15:22,839 you know what? 353 00:15:22,923 --> 00:15:25,050 I'm gonna climb this tree, see if I can get a better view 354 00:15:25,133 --> 00:15:26,718 of the parking lot or the road or something. 355 00:15:26,802 --> 00:15:28,637 - Uh... - You don't think it's safe? 356 00:15:28,678 --> 00:15:31,973 No, it's just you've never given me nimble. 357 00:15:34,476 --> 00:15:36,603 You know what? 358 00:15:36,645 --> 00:15:39,314 Watch this. 359 00:15:39,356 --> 00:15:41,316 Okay, here we go. 360 00:15:41,358 --> 00:15:45,112 Ooh. 361 00:15:45,153 --> 00:15:49,282 It's always more firm than you think it's gonna be. 362 00:15:49,324 --> 00:15:51,159 Ooh. Okay. 363 00:15:51,243 --> 00:15:54,746 Not so fast. Not so fast. 364 00:15:54,830 --> 00:15:55,956 Just... 365 00:15:58,834 --> 00:16:00,794 - Okay. - Ugh. 366 00:16:03,588 --> 00:16:05,424 Ah... 367 00:16:07,342 --> 00:16:09,636 I can't see anything. I think I got to get higher. 368 00:16:09,678 --> 00:16:11,138 Be careful. 369 00:16:11,179 --> 00:16:13,682 It's fine. 370 00:16:13,765 --> 00:16:15,016 - Oh. - It's fine. 371 00:16:16,351 --> 00:16:18,395 - There's a... there's a bee. - Ah. 372 00:16:18,478 --> 00:16:20,063 Get out of here. 373 00:16:20,147 --> 00:16:21,940 Oh! Oh, God! 374 00:16:22,023 --> 00:16:23,942 - Oh, God, are you okay? - Ow. Fuck. 375 00:16:24,025 --> 00:16:26,987 - What happened? - Oh, I got stung by a bee. 376 00:16:27,028 --> 00:16:28,530 Oh, where? Where? 377 00:16:28,572 --> 00:16:30,282 Oh, let me see. 378 00:16:30,365 --> 00:16:32,451 Oh, yeah. He got you. 379 00:16:32,534 --> 00:16:34,578 She. Male bees don't sting. 380 00:16:34,661 --> 00:16:37,664 Oh, honey, give it a rest. 381 00:16:37,706 --> 00:16:39,082 Yeah, I think we should keep moving. 382 00:16:39,165 --> 00:16:41,752 Yeah, come on, let's... let's walk it off. 383 00:16:41,835 --> 00:16:44,254 - Okay. - Okay, here we go. 384 00:16:57,309 --> 00:16:59,728 - Does it hurt? - Ah, yeah. 385 00:16:59,811 --> 00:17:02,063 But I don't blame the bee, though. 386 00:17:02,147 --> 00:17:04,023 Oh, good. 387 00:17:04,065 --> 00:17:06,568 - This is their world. We're pushing them out. 388 00:17:06,651 --> 00:17:08,694 I mean, they're going extinct because of us. 389 00:17:08,737 --> 00:17:11,323 - Actually, I deserved it. - Agreed. 390 00:17:11,364 --> 00:17:13,241 Bees are not going extinct. 391 00:17:13,282 --> 00:17:14,742 Yes, they are. 392 00:17:14,826 --> 00:17:18,079 Climate change is literally wreaking havoc on their ecosystem. 393 00:17:18,121 --> 00:17:20,165 The Earth is a billion years old. 394 00:17:20,248 --> 00:17:23,376 It just self-corrects for any damage that's done to it. 395 00:17:23,417 --> 00:17:25,628 No, we're destroying the planet. 396 00:17:25,712 --> 00:17:27,047 It's a proven fact. 397 00:17:27,089 --> 00:17:29,132 Trust me, we're fine. 398 00:17:29,216 --> 00:17:32,761 Um, think I'll trust the thousands and thousands of scientists 399 00:17:32,803 --> 00:17:34,346 over you on this one, but thanks. 400 00:17:34,429 --> 00:17:36,973 Oh, sure. Trust a bunch of men over me. 401 00:17:37,057 --> 00:17:39,392 Oh, my God, you are being sexist 402 00:17:39,434 --> 00:17:41,770 while accusing me of being sexist. 403 00:17:41,812 --> 00:17:44,022 Did you know that wildlife populations 404 00:17:44,106 --> 00:17:46,608 have diminished 70% since 1970? 405 00:17:46,650 --> 00:17:49,861 I don't buy that, I'm sorry. I always see animals. 406 00:17:49,945 --> 00:17:52,030 The problem is, there's too many people. 407 00:17:52,114 --> 00:17:54,616 I remember a day when you could walk down Fifth Avenue 408 00:17:54,699 --> 00:17:56,618 from the Plaza to Cartier and see 10, 409 00:17:56,660 --> 00:17:58,620 maybe 12 people, tops. 410 00:17:58,703 --> 00:18:00,789 Now it's a shit show. 411 00:18:00,872 --> 00:18:03,583 Believe me, no one's going extinct anytime soon. 412 00:18:03,625 --> 00:18:05,419 People like having sex too much. 413 00:18:05,502 --> 00:18:07,212 You got nothing to worry about. 414 00:18:07,295 --> 00:18:10,048 Why... why won't you admit that this is a problem? 415 00:18:12,134 --> 00:18:15,303 Look, even if what you say is true, 416 00:18:15,387 --> 00:18:17,264 what can any one person do about it? 417 00:18:17,347 --> 00:18:18,640 Well, you're right. 418 00:18:18,682 --> 00:18:20,434 Your average person can't do as much 419 00:18:20,517 --> 00:18:21,768 as corporations or governments. 420 00:18:21,810 --> 00:18:23,103 There you go. Case closed. 421 00:18:23,145 --> 00:18:25,313 Um, I said average person. 422 00:18:25,355 --> 00:18:27,149 You're one of the biggest climate criminals I know. 423 00:18:27,190 --> 00:18:28,859 Your carbon footprint is huge. 424 00:18:28,942 --> 00:18:31,069 Well, not as big as your carbon handprint. 425 00:18:31,253 --> 00:18:33,296 Hey, we had an agreement. 426 00:18:33,380 --> 00:18:35,340 I'm handicapped now. I have more rights. 427 00:18:35,423 --> 00:18:37,342 - Okay, you know what? Joke all you want. 428 00:18:37,425 --> 00:18:39,177 But you drive cars that are inefficient. 429 00:18:39,261 --> 00:18:41,012 You take a private jet everywhere. 430 00:18:41,096 --> 00:18:43,974 - Not everywhere. - All the stuff that you sell on QVC, 431 00:18:44,057 --> 00:18:45,600 it's all plastic and fast fashion. 432 00:18:45,642 --> 00:18:48,645 Polyester doesn't degrade. It's made from oil. 433 00:18:48,728 --> 00:18:51,523 Okay, Forever 21 is basically Exxon. 434 00:18:51,606 --> 00:18:53,608 Zara... BP. 435 00:18:53,692 --> 00:18:55,610 Listen, I'm not saying you're wrong. 436 00:18:55,652 --> 00:18:58,446 It's just that young people are just 437 00:18:58,488 --> 00:19:00,949 so much more dramatic about everything. 438 00:19:00,991 --> 00:19:02,701 When you live long enough, you realize things 439 00:19:02,784 --> 00:19:06,705 don't change that drastically. 440 00:19:06,788 --> 00:19:09,124 Okay, think of it this way... when you play a comedy club, 441 00:19:09,207 --> 00:19:11,626 you don't do the shitty material at the end of your set 442 00:19:11,710 --> 00:19:14,045 and leave the crowd cold out of respect for the comedian 443 00:19:14,129 --> 00:19:15,797 - following you, right? - Of course not. 444 00:19:15,881 --> 00:19:18,675 Okay, so maybe think of the Earth that way. 445 00:19:21,761 --> 00:19:24,055 Neither one of us is gonna have a future 446 00:19:24,139 --> 00:19:27,851 if we don't get the he... hell out of here. 447 00:19:27,934 --> 00:19:30,228 It's gonna be dark soon. 448 00:19:32,647 --> 00:19:34,941 I think I should go ahead and find help. 449 00:19:34,983 --> 00:19:38,195 No. D-don't leave me. 450 00:19:38,278 --> 00:19:39,613 Okay, I won't. 451 00:19:39,654 --> 00:19:41,907 I-I can keep going. 452 00:19:43,617 --> 00:19:45,535 Let's... let's go. 453 00:19:55,337 --> 00:19:57,172 Oh, it's so steep. 454 00:19:57,214 --> 00:19:59,841 Yeah, well, remember in the beginning, we were going down? 455 00:19:59,925 --> 00:20:01,927 - Yeah? - Well, this must be the end 456 00:20:02,010 --> 00:20:03,136 'cause we're going up. 457 00:20:03,178 --> 00:20:04,596 We got it. 458 00:20:04,679 --> 00:20:06,431 Oh, shit. 459 00:20:10,685 --> 00:20:13,522 - Fuck! - Shit. It's not a loop. 460 00:20:13,605 --> 00:20:16,483 We've just been walking deeper and deeper into the woods. 461 00:20:16,525 --> 00:20:18,944 God damn it! 462 00:20:20,779 --> 00:20:23,406 I think we should start thinking about making shelter. 463 00:20:23,490 --> 00:20:24,908 Making shelter? 464 00:20:24,991 --> 00:20:26,493 I'm not gonna sleep out here! 465 00:20:26,535 --> 00:20:28,411 Besides, I have to be at QVC in three hours. 466 00:20:28,495 --> 00:20:30,247 We're rolling out new infinity scarves. 467 00:20:30,330 --> 00:20:32,874 Literally nothing could sound less urgent to me. 468 00:20:32,916 --> 00:20:34,876 They come with matching beanies. 469 00:20:34,918 --> 00:20:37,712 - Okay. - Look... 470 00:20:37,754 --> 00:20:40,423 we're gonna hear the search helicopter any second. 471 00:20:40,507 --> 00:20:41,758 I'm worth way too much money 472 00:20:41,841 --> 00:20:43,510 for them to not come and look for me. 473 00:20:43,552 --> 00:20:45,303 How are they gonna find us? 474 00:20:45,387 --> 00:20:48,807 We didn't tell anyone where we were going. 475 00:20:48,890 --> 00:20:50,934 Oh. Right. 476 00:20:51,017 --> 00:20:52,769 Look, it's gonna be, like, 30 degrees tonight. 477 00:20:52,853 --> 00:20:54,646 So, if you're really against the shelter plan, 478 00:20:54,729 --> 00:20:57,190 then we need to get serious about finding some help. 479 00:21:00,819 --> 00:21:02,320 Help! 480 00:21:02,404 --> 00:21:06,074 Help! 481 00:21:06,116 --> 00:21:07,826 Help! 482 00:21:07,909 --> 00:21:11,413 - Somebody, please help! - Help! 483 00:21:17,752 --> 00:21:19,921 Wait, I know why it's not working. 484 00:21:20,005 --> 00:21:22,340 - I-I read this study. - Not now, Ava. 485 00:21:22,424 --> 00:21:24,676 No, it's relevant. I promise, okay? 486 00:21:24,759 --> 00:21:26,303 It was about emergency response. 487 00:21:26,386 --> 00:21:28,138 It said people are less likely to help someone 488 00:21:28,221 --> 00:21:29,639 if they hear them yelling "help." 489 00:21:29,723 --> 00:21:31,266 Oh, that's right. 490 00:21:31,308 --> 00:21:32,767 You're... you're supposed to yell "fire," right? 491 00:21:32,809 --> 00:21:34,561 No, no, no, you're supposed to yell, 492 00:21:34,603 --> 00:21:37,147 "Why are you doing this to me? I don't even know you." 493 00:21:37,230 --> 00:21:38,982 We're gonna die out here. 494 00:21:39,065 --> 00:21:41,985 No, it's because if people hear a woman screaming help, 495 00:21:42,068 --> 00:21:43,904 they think she's in a domestic dispute with her husband 496 00:21:43,945 --> 00:21:45,739 'cause he won't let her have a credit card or something, 497 00:21:45,780 --> 00:21:47,616 so they don't do anything. 498 00:21:47,657 --> 00:21:49,367 That's why you got to yell, "Why are you doing this to me? 499 00:21:49,451 --> 00:21:50,827 I don't even know you." 500 00:21:50,911 --> 00:21:52,329 That's ridiculous. 501 00:21:56,833 --> 00:21:58,585 Why are you doing this to me? 502 00:21:58,627 --> 00:22:00,629 I don't even know you! 503 00:22:00,670 --> 00:22:04,049 Why are you doing this to me? I don't even know you! 504 00:22:04,132 --> 00:22:07,552 Why are you doing this to me? I don't even know you! 505 00:22:07,636 --> 00:22:12,224 Why are you doing this to me? I don't even know you! 506 00:22:19,147 --> 00:22:21,107 Okay. 507 00:22:21,149 --> 00:22:24,402 Let's make a fire. 508 00:22:24,444 --> 00:22:25,654 Yeah. 509 00:22:32,285 --> 00:22:35,205 So ironic that you can't make a fire. 510 00:22:35,288 --> 00:22:40,168 Ah, now this would make a great late-night story. 511 00:22:42,879 --> 00:22:45,507 It's not happening. 512 00:22:45,549 --> 00:22:47,884 You know, this is the first time I've missed 513 00:22:47,968 --> 00:22:51,763 my skin-care regimen since the Bush administration. 514 00:22:51,846 --> 00:22:53,682 I'm talking H.W. 515 00:22:53,723 --> 00:22:58,353 I'm so sorry I made us come out here and then got us lost. 516 00:22:58,395 --> 00:23:00,021 We should have just gone to the mall. 517 00:23:00,105 --> 00:23:03,149 I could've... could've gotten Auntie Anne's. 518 00:23:03,191 --> 00:23:05,026 Oh, I shouldn't have been so hard on you. 519 00:23:05,110 --> 00:23:08,822 It's not your fault my stupid body broke down. 520 00:23:08,864 --> 00:23:10,949 Come on, you're in great shape. 521 00:23:12,784 --> 00:23:14,327 Say it. 522 00:23:14,369 --> 00:23:17,205 "For a woman your age." 523 00:23:21,209 --> 00:23:23,962 You know, your whole life... 524 00:23:24,045 --> 00:23:25,463 you say, "One day." 525 00:23:25,547 --> 00:23:27,674 You know, "One day, I'll do this. 526 00:23:27,716 --> 00:23:31,970 One day, I'll accomplish that." 527 00:23:33,555 --> 00:23:37,976 And the magic of "one day" is that it's all ahead of you. 528 00:23:39,728 --> 00:23:42,772 But for me, "one day" is now. 529 00:23:46,443 --> 00:23:49,696 Anything I want to do, 530 00:23:49,738 --> 00:23:52,991 I have to do now... 531 00:23:53,074 --> 00:23:55,744 or else I'll never do it. 532 00:23:55,785 --> 00:23:59,623 That's the worst part of getting older. 533 00:23:59,706 --> 00:24:02,250 I believe you told me that the worst part 534 00:24:02,292 --> 00:24:04,377 about getting older is the collagen loss. 535 00:24:04,419 --> 00:24:07,380 That too. 536 00:24:07,422 --> 00:24:09,257 The best part of being young 537 00:24:09,341 --> 00:24:13,053 is that you don't have to savor everything. 538 00:24:13,094 --> 00:24:16,097 You don't even have to consider it, you know. 539 00:24:16,181 --> 00:24:17,933 Eat that candy bar. 540 00:24:17,974 --> 00:24:21,228 Sleep in on Saturday morning. 541 00:24:24,606 --> 00:24:26,566 Or have a breakup. 542 00:24:29,694 --> 00:24:32,948 It's not the end of the world. 543 00:24:32,989 --> 00:24:35,116 It's just the beginning. 544 00:24:37,911 --> 00:24:41,790 That's the ultimate luxury... 545 00:24:41,831 --> 00:24:46,294 not having to suck the marrow out of every day. 546 00:24:47,796 --> 00:24:52,133 Just toss the bones, not even make a soup. 547 00:24:54,010 --> 00:24:56,721 Sorry, I'm really hungry. 548 00:24:58,473 --> 00:25:01,309 - What was that? - Was that an animal? 549 00:25:01,351 --> 00:25:03,645 Why are you doing this to me? I don't even know you! 550 00:25:03,687 --> 00:25:05,146 Why are you doing this to me? 551 00:25:05,188 --> 00:25:06,898 I don't even know you! 552 00:25:06,982 --> 00:25:09,734 Why are you doing this to me? I don't even know you! 553 00:25:09,818 --> 00:25:12,737 Why are you doing this to me? I don't even know you! 554 00:25:18,869 --> 00:25:21,121 Are you guys okay? 555 00:25:26,167 --> 00:25:27,669 Oh, my God. 556 00:25:27,711 --> 00:25:29,087 - Yeah, we are. - Oh. 557 00:25:29,170 --> 00:25:30,630 - Thank you. - Hi. 558 00:25:30,672 --> 00:25:32,132 Oh. 559 00:25:32,173 --> 00:25:34,009 We're alive. We're alive. 560 00:26:02,078 --> 00:26:04,164 - Okay. - Oh. 561 00:26:04,206 --> 00:26:05,832 I got you. I got you. 562 00:26:05,874 --> 00:26:07,834 - Oh. Oh. - I got you. I got you. 563 00:26:07,876 --> 00:26:09,711 Careful. 564 00:26:09,753 --> 00:26:12,339 Careful. Okay. 565 00:26:12,380 --> 00:26:14,299 Okay. Okay. 566 00:26:14,382 --> 00:26:15,675 Oh, wait, wait. 567 00:26:15,717 --> 00:26:19,054 Boys, I-I can't thank you enough. 568 00:26:19,095 --> 00:26:20,805 And to show you my gratitude, 569 00:26:20,889 --> 00:26:23,058 I'll tell you what I'm gonna do. 570 00:26:23,099 --> 00:26:26,561 I'm gonna build an in-home QVC studio 571 00:26:26,645 --> 00:26:30,106 so that I do not have to depend so much on my private jet. 572 00:26:33,902 --> 00:26:40,158 And I'm gonna transition half of my portfolio into green stocks. 573 00:26:40,242 --> 00:26:41,576 And? 574 00:26:43,245 --> 00:26:45,288 And install solar panels, 575 00:26:45,372 --> 00:26:47,457 even though it's going to ruin the roofline. 576 00:26:47,541 --> 00:26:50,043 Okay. 577 00:26:50,085 --> 00:26:51,419 Ask her. 578 00:26:51,461 --> 00:26:53,880 Oh, could you also buy us Mike's Hard? 579 00:26:53,922 --> 00:26:56,716 Whatever you want. I owe you. 580 00:26:56,758 --> 00:26:58,343 Sick. 581 00:26:58,426 --> 00:27:01,429 Come on. 582 00:27:01,471 --> 00:27:02,889 Nice to meet you guys. 583 00:27:02,931 --> 00:27:04,808 - Take care. - Nice to meet you. 584 00:27:04,891 --> 00:27:06,101 Got it? 585 00:27:06,142 --> 00:27:07,519 No, you know what? I'm driving. 586 00:27:07,602 --> 00:27:08,937 Okay. 587 00:27:08,979 --> 00:27:10,689 - Let's get you around. - Okay. Ah. 588 00:27:10,772 --> 00:27:12,232 You know, it's like when you say goodbye, 589 00:27:12,274 --> 00:27:13,608 and then you're not leaving... it's crazy. 590 00:27:13,692 --> 00:27:15,026 Okay, get in the car. 591 00:27:15,110 --> 00:27:16,736 Okay. 592 00:27:16,778 --> 00:27:18,738 Or s-should we follow you for the Mike's Hard stuff? 593 00:27:18,780 --> 00:27:20,115 - Yeah. - Okay. 594 00:27:20,156 --> 00:27:21,449 Got her? 595 00:27:21,533 --> 00:27:23,368 God, there you are. 596 00:27:23,451 --> 00:27:25,120 Holy shit, are you... are you okay? 597 00:27:25,161 --> 00:27:27,789 I have to sell infinity scarves. 598 00:27:29,291 --> 00:27:30,792 Okay, what happened? 599 00:27:30,876 --> 00:27:32,711 We took a walk. 600 00:27:32,794 --> 00:27:34,129 She looks rough. 601 00:27:34,170 --> 00:27:36,923 I heard that! 602 00:27:36,965 --> 00:27:39,301 What the fuck? Uh, can we get a medic, please? 603 00:27:41,595 --> 00:27:43,972 You shouldn't use plastic. 604 00:27:45,000 --> 00:27:50,000 - Synced and corrected by chamallow - - www.addic7ed.com -